


from this life to the next

by vent_ficpog



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Anorexia, Depression, Eating Disorders, Hospitalization, Near Death Experiences, Other, Parent Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Protective Parent Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Recovery, Running Away, Self-Harm, Sleepy Bois Inc Angst, Sleepy Bois Inc as Family, Suicidal Thoughts, Trans Male Character, Transphobia, abuse but not in sbi, platonic!!! all of it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-25
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-15 20:00:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 16,904
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29689188
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vent_ficpog/pseuds/vent_ficpog
Summary: tw for the things in the tags!wilbur is sick. from the start to the end, he’s known he’s sick. from the hospital to across the country, he never denied that one fact.after finding karl, he and karl self destruct together. but soon, they find out getting better is a lot more rewarding.this is painful LOL major vent fic
Relationships: Wilbur Soot & Technoblade & TommyInnit & Phil Watson
Comments: 58
Kudos: 166





	1. fabric and feelings

everything was abnormal about wilbur.

from youth he’d been hopping around foster care. from drug addict homes to abusive foster parents, he’d seen it all. so when he ended up with phil at age 13, it felt all too formal and nice.

even away from the issue of foster care, he was abnormal. he had good grades for most his life until freshman year, which was strange considering he prided himself in his knowledge. phil prodded and asked questions as to why, but never recieved a clear, direct answer.

and he as a person was abnormal. abnormally skinny. abnormally withdrawn. abnormally distraught. growing up, he thought he was just wrong. he thought being born a girl was wrong, and he learned later why it had felt so wrong. 

the little lies to slip past his lips writing off every meal he could. the bruised body that was so fragile, his brothers were too afraid to hug him, as if he’d snap. he was all too abnormal.

but to him, it felt entirely normal. being terrified to eat, screaming at himself in the mirror for gaining weight, spending hours upon hours researching calories and obsessing. it was all normal for wilbur.

when he woke up every morning, it felt normal. just like it did today. he swung his legs from his bed, the ache never subsiding. his body felt so weak and his head was pounding. he barely acknowledged the deep emptiness within his stomach as he slipped on a baggy jumper and baggy sweatpants, adding his signature beanie.

the clothes were really just to hide the body he was so disgusted by, and the beanie to stop people from noticing his all-too-thin hair. his hands were red on the knuckles constantly, his views bright blue pushing against his skin. his hands were nearly translucent.

he heard a shout from the kitchen that breakfast was ready and he swore. he had used the excuse of getting up too late the past few days, so he resolved to jumping in the shower.

as he was washing his hair, strands of it pulled away from his head. he stared at the brown locks and rinsed them off his hands, resuming the shower. occasional knocks on the door of his father pestering him to come down to breakfast annoyed him, but he could manage.

he turned off the shower and closed his eyes as he walked infront of the mirror. he quickly used the bathroom and dried off, weighing himself.

he could have cried seeing the number. realistically, he knew he was underweight. but the number made the fat under his skin burn at the thin layer holding it in. he wanted to cut the fat from his body with a knife and stomp on it at that moment. 

“wilbur! we need to leave in 10 minutes. come on!” tommy whined from outside the door.

”god! ill be right out.” he grumbled. he threw on his outfit, adjusting his binder and stretching out the pain from sleeping in it. he opened the door, seeing tommy waiting to brush his teeth.

tommy reached out, latching onto wilburs arm. he froze for a moment, unnerved at how easily the fabric fell away and the bones pushed through. he pulled himself back and spoke up. 

“wilbur! other people live here, you can’t hog the bathroom.” tommy complained.

wilbur wretched his arm away and held it close to his body. he rolled his eyes and strolled to the kitchen to grab his backpack.

the car ride to school was lively. phil laughing at his sons and handing around the aux cord, tommy joking about how he could beat up techno.

”oh come on! you couldn’t even beat up wilbur and he’s like, tiny.” techno laughed and looked out the front windshield.

”i’ll have you know i definetly cou-“

”what?” wilbur asked.

”hm?” techno replied.

”what do you mean i’m ‘tiny’?” wilbur mumbled. he loved being considered as small but it felt like an invasion of his secret.

techno cleared his throat, “just that you’re skinny!” he paused and continued, “to be fair, you are a giant though. who the hell is six foot fucking five?”

wilbur shrugged off the mention of his weight and smiled, looking out the window. he waited until the car parked in the school parking lot and raced away from the car, hoping to lose his brothers in the crowd. unfortunately, he could never win the battle with his brothers.

techno slung an arm over wilburs frame and walked beside him. “you alright? you seemed mad at me in the car.” he said calmly.

wilbur huffed and attempted to free himself, finding it difficult.

”i will only follow you until you answer me, y’know.”

”i’m not even that skinny, tech. you guys think i’m weak or something,” he replied. he picked up his walking pace and opened the door to the school, techno trailing behind.

techno froze hearing this, grabbing wilbur shoulder and spinning him around to face him, he said, “wilbur, what?” 

wilbur paused and raised an eyebrow. “what do you mean ‘what?’” he said, mocking techno.

”you aren’t weak, no. but you are literally fuckin’ skin and bones.” techno pressed forward, worryingly. he went to continue but wilbur cut him off quickly. 

“okay, got it. just drop it, okay?” 

wil sped off towards class, leaving techno confused in the hallway before he left to meet up with his friends.

the day passed by painfully average. he took notes in his class, half-assed some assignments, went to lunch (spending it in the library), and went home. the day was normal. just painfully normal.

he sat quietly in his room, attempting to finish a project. a knock on the door made him jump and he sighed, shouting a quick “come in!”.

the door opened and his father stepped inside, smiling. “hey wil!” 

wilbur returned the smile. “hey dad! sorry, i’m just doing some homework. what’s up?”

”techno came to me today, worried about you.” phil said. his smile fell and he sat down beside wilbur on his bed.

wilbur raised an eyebrow and turned towards phil, adjusting his beanie. 

“okay? about what?” he asked slowly.

”says you two got into an argument today before school,” he cleared his throat and continued. “says he thinks somethings wrong, but couldn’t specify what.”

wilburs eyes grew wide and his heart dropped. he frowned and replied, turning away. “just some dumb fight. nothing serious, dad.”

phil frowned slightly before nodding. “if you need anything, let me know.” 

he stood and left slowly, leaving wilbur to his thoughts.

and all he could think right now was that he hated techno.


	2. of blood and secrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> wilbur gets found out for cutting this is sad LOL
> 
> tw self harm, kinda graphic?

wilbur left his room only a minute after his father, bursting into technos room and slamming the door behind him.

”you fucking weasel!” he screamed, pointing an accusing finger at techno as he raced towards him. 

techno took a shaky breath after recoiling and hit the mute button on his mic. he barely heard his friends’ confused voices and worried questions as he took off his headset. “what?” 

wilbur grabbed the collar of his brothers sweater and lifted him from the chair. techno nearly laughed at the sight; wilbur was a scrawny kid, trying to lift up this 6’3 man who trained in combat. it was nearly pathetic, but it scared him nonetheless.“what the fuck is wrong with you?” he hissed. “stay out of my business, you asshole.”

techno was having flashbacks to previous homes and he started to panic. he hit hard on wilburs forearm, causing his brother to scream in pain and collapse to the ground, holding his arm.

”fuck! fuck you, techno!” he screamed. the hit had reopened recent cuts and blood began to pour onto his sleeve.

techno was shaking, staring at his brother on the floor. he heard the door open as his father rushed in.

”wilbur!” he cried out, sitting beside his son. “what happened? hey, wil, it’s just me. look at me,” phil pleaded. he examined his son, noticing the blood immediately. his eyes shot to techno and he began to panic.

”dad he-“ techno tried to speak but his voice was quivering. he stared at his shaking hands and continued, “i didn’t hurt him! he was yelling and i- i didn’t hit him with anything, that blood isn’t from me!” 

“wilbur, bud, let me see. i’ll get the first aid kit, techno you examine him okay?” phil said, rushing from the room.

wilbur recoiled from his brother and shuffled back to the wall, wrapping his arms around his body. tears slipped from his eyes as he began to mumble pleads along the lines of, ‘don’t tell dad’.

techno wasn’t sure what to do. his brother was bleeding on the floor and he didn’t even know what from! he decided it best to check, though, how bad it was.

and oh boy, did he regret it.

he sat beside wilbur and latched onto his brothers arm, doing his best to avoid the injured area. he began to roll up the sleeve before wilbur screamed and jumped to his feet, nearly toppling over.

”don’t touch me! don’t fucking-“ wilbur shouted, fear in his voice. just then, phil returned with the first aid kit.

”wilbur come here-“

”none of you fucking touch me!” he yelled. 

phil knew his son didn’t like to be touched, especially not during panic attacks. he didn’t think it was because of a secret he’d been keeping, just a panic attack.

he set the first aid kit infront of wilbur and backed away, hands by his sides. he let wilbur pick it up and rush off to the bathroom as he kneeled infront of techno. 

“tech, bud. can you tell me what happened?” he asked gently.

techno stared at his hands. “i didn’t do that, right? i didn’t hurt him?”

”i don’t know. all that matters is you didn’t mean to, okay? what happened before that?” 

“well, wilbur ran in here yelling at me. he slammed my door and it really scared me, because of, yknow..” he said, trailing off before forcing himself to finish the story. “he came over to me and started yelling at me and he grabbed me by my shirt and pulled me off my chair. and i was really scared so i was hitting his arm so he’d let go, then he screamed and blood was everywhere.” he explained quickly.

phil tried to remain calm, but worry growing by the second. “okay.. and what was he yelling at you for?”

”just saying to stay away from him and his business, i don’t know what i did though.” techno replied quietly.

phil thought for a moment before his eyes went wide. he stood quickly and looked to techno. “no, you didn’t hurt him, tech. go to tommy’s room, okay?”

techno nodded and sat at his desk, quickly unmuting and announcing that he had to go before hanging up. he then raced to tommy’s room, seeing the boy curled in a ball, hands over his ears. tommy, like techno, had issues with loud noises.

phil however, was going to wilbur. he knocked on the bathroom door and wilbur gasped. he dropped something and the sound of something hitting the ground was audible from the hallway.

”wilbur, let me in please.”

”fuck off!”

”wilbur let me in or i will have to call someone to check on you.” phil said softly.

he mumbled something and shuffling could be heard from inside the bathroom. he opened the door about fifteen seconds later, wearing a black sweater this time.

”roll up your sleeves, wil.” 

Wilbur recoiled slightly and shook his head. he clutched the ends of his sweater in his fists as his posture went rigid.

”that wasn’t a request, please roll up your sleeves wilbur.”

he stumbled backwards and collapsed into a sitting position on the floor, he tucked his arms close to his chest and protected them with his knees.

phil sighed, stepping into the bathroom. he closed the door and sat beside his son. “i’m not an idiot. i would never force you to tell me anything but your safety is at risk if i’m right about this.” he paused before continuing. “roll up the sleeves, wilbur.”

wilbur dropped his head in between his chest and knees and he began to cry quietly. he eventually raised his head, turning to face his dad as he held out his arms. he rolled them up one at a time, staring straight into phil’s eyes.

phil could have vomited looking at the sight infront of him. fresh blood was pouring from wounds on his sons arms and older scars lied scattered around.

”give me it.” phil demanded. he didn’t want to sound angry, but he couldn’t lie and say he wasn’t. 

Wilbur rolled his eyes and dug his hand into his pocket, taking out a razor blade. he dropped it into phil’s hand and rolled down his sleeves, folding his arms over his chest.

meanwhile, in tommy’s room, techno and tommy were sat on the floor techno read quietly to his younger brother, calming him down. he was reading one of tommy’s favorite books, harry potter. he didnt know which one of the series it was specifically but he knew tommy loved them all.

tommy rested his head on technos arm and soon, he was fast asleep. techno carefully picked up his brother and set him in bed, making sure he had enough blankets. he left the room quietly, walking down the hallway to use the bathroom. he heard soft voices from inside and listened with his ear to the door.

”-but cutting? please, you can always talk to me. you never need to turn to things like this. imagine if tommy or techno, or even i did this. you’d be heartbroken just like i am now.” he heard phil say.

”whatever.” wilbur mumbled.

technos eyes filled with tears as he ran off to his room, curling up into a ball on his bed.


	3. fathers and razors

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sad sad sad

the week following was hell on earth for everyone in the house. wilbur was reeling from the effects of being found out and phil was scheduling appointments with therapists as quickly as he could. they all went to school as usual, but wilbur refused to be anywhere near his family. phil figured the skipping of meals was just not wanting to eat dinner with him and his brothers.

techno was still confused. cutting? he’d only heard of that in movies about sick people and mental illness. he didn’t know people actually did that.

he did want to know the appeal, though. why had his brother done it?

he figured once couldnt hurt. just to try and understand wilbur. 

he carefully unscrewed the blade from his pencil sharpener and stared at it. he wasn’t too sure how it worked but he figured you just sliced on the arm.

he rested the blade on his skin and dug in, swiping it a few inches. he almost screamed for a moment at the pain, but it was quickly taken over by a wave of calmness. he stared at the wound, which was rather small compared to what he figured his brother did, but it was unbelievably calming. 

he took a few more swipes and smiled to himself. he figured he understood, now.

tommy was taking a different approach. being fifteen, he was starting to hang around not so good people. his brothers were both seventeen, about two months apart. as a person, he was pretty childish. but it was a comforting thing for him.

he dug into his backpack and took out a container. he fished a small bag out of it and made small lines on his desk. unknown to him that his brother was slicing his arms only a wall away. 

phil had no clue his other two sons were devolving like this, only worrying about wilbur at the moment. he was making phone call after phone call, finding a good therapist for wilbur. 

the next morning, techno was practically glowing and tommy had a killer headache. it was a saturday so they didn’t have to get up too early, so tommy waking up at 2 pm didn’t surprise him. techno, however, was acting strange. he was up at 7AM, which was extremely abnormal.

”hey dad! can i take the car? i need to go to the art supply store.” he asked, smiling.

phil nodded and tossed him the car keys and 20$, continuing to speak to someone on the phone. techno raced out the door and sped off towards the store.

he paced the isles quietly until he found the right one. he selected a pack of razor blades off the shelf and ran to the check out line. 

”so, what you buying these for?” the cashier asked. techno hadn’t looked up from his phone since he got in line, so hearing dreams voice nearly made he yell.

”dream?”

”hey, tech.” dream replied, staring sadly at his friend. he checked if there were any customers after techno and relaxed when he saw the store was empty.

“oh! well i better leave quick, dad wants me home. how much?”

”you’re dodging the question.” dream said, unimpressed.

”no i’m not!

dream went to continue speaking, but a person walked up beside techno. he shut his mouth and froze.

”is there an issue, clay?”

”i uhm- this is my friend,”

techno turned to the side and examined the man. dream looked terrified, and only his family called him clay.

”you can’t deny a customer the right to buy something. ring the boy up.” he leaned over the counter and whispered, “we will talk about this at home.”

dreams face went pale and he scanned the item, handing it to techno as he exchanged it for money. he quickly gave him change and a reciept.

”have a nice day, sir.” dream said in a robotic like tone. 

techno raised an eyebrow and took his change, pocketing it. dream stared straight ahead as the man walked away and techno immedietly spoke up.

”okay, what the hell was that?”

”my father.” dream said, scratching his neck. “go, tech. i’ll see you on monday?”

”yeah, monday.” he nodded and walked away, confused.


	4. t shirts in the rain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> STRICTLY PLATONIC NOTHJNG WEIRD LOL
> 
> ok we have been rlly techno centric these past two chapters i swear we r going back to wilbur soon
> 
> major tw for abuse and transphobia + misgenderinf + t slur in this chapter! 
> 
> (i’m trans so i can write the slur but it makes me feel gross so i don’t do it often but be warned, it’s there)

phil usually let dream and techno study at their home for the weekly tutoring sessions, but after everything with wilbur, he didn’t think he could handle the two boys. techno and dream were driving to dreams house from school, talking about what they would study for in the tutoring session when techno noticed it.

dream was wincing every few seconds, trying to conceal it. he looked to be pain, which only worried techno.

”you okay over there?” techno asked.

dream nodded and adjusted his seating before turning down another street. techno shrugged as he pulled into a driveway. it was raining quite hard, so they quickly grabbed their backpacks and raced inside.

techno groaned at his soaked hoodie and frowned. dream stared at him and laughed a little.

”you can borrow some of my clothes. i’ll have to change too.” 

techno nodded and followed dream up the stairs. he noticed a slight limp from dream but chose to ignore it for now.

dream opened the door to his room and rummaged in the closet. “most of my jackets are dirty so i’ll give you a shirt, if that’s okay.”

technos eyes widened and he gulped. “yeah. uhm. that’s fine.” short sleeves. he’d completely forgotten about that.

dream grabbed two shirts and tossed one to techno. techno changed quickly as dream threw off his old shirt and went to put on the new one. he stopped in his tracks when techno shrieked.

”dream! what the hell is that?” he said, rushing over to his friend. he examined a large bruise in the shape of a footprint that rested along dreams rib cage.

dream raised his eyebrows and looked in the mirror. he swore and threw on the t shirt as techno stared at him shocked.

”i could ask you the same thing,” dream replied scoffing, gesturing to technos arms.

techno quickly looked down to his arms and his eyes went wide. “uhm. guess we’ve both got some explaining to do?”

dream froze, registering what he had said. “wait, those are-“

”don’t say it out loud! dear god.” techno laughed a little despite the awful situation.

”sit. fuck tutoring, we gotta have a talk.”

techno and dream sat side by side on dreams bed in silence for a few moments before dream spoke up.

”guess i’ll go first. gotta rip the band-aid off, right?” he laughed lightly and cleared his throat. “my fathers not the best.”

”and he beats you? i wouldn’t call that ‘not the best’, i’d call that abusive.”

dream shrugged. “your turn.”

techno wrapped his arms around himself and frowned. “just uhm. made a bad choice, i guess?”

“i wouldn’t call that a ‘bad choice’, i’d call that self harm.” dream said, mocking what techno had said moments before. they both laughed a little before techno spoke again.

”so why’d he hit you?”

”because i’m not the son he wanted, i guess.” he answered. he swung his legs idly and wrapped an arm around technos shoulder. “why’d you cut?”

”because i wanted to know what it felt like.” techno leaned into dreams side and frowned again. “i won’t do it again, i think.”

”you think?”

”i mean, it’s not like i’ll get in trouble for it, i guess?” techno explained.

dream scoffed. “you know the first thing i should do right now?” techno hummed, and dream continued. “i should walk straight up to your dad and tell him ‘your dipshit son is killing himself’! but i won’t. as long as you don’t do it again.”

techno shifted and shrugged off dreams shoulder. “i’m not killing myself.”

the two sat in silence for a moment before they decided they should get drinks. they walked quietly down the stairs and into the kitchen, hearing a door slam moments after. 

dream jumped, nearly dropping the glass he was holding. he swiftly pushed techno behind him.

”the fuck you doing, boy?”

”getting a drink, sir.” dream replied.

his father stumbled closer and quickly saw techno.

”who’s this?” his father asked, laughing. dream shielded techno as well as he could before his dad pushed past him, looking at techno.

”you friends with a tranny, clay?”

techno flinched and dream froze. “don’t call him that.”

dreams father spun to face his son and pointed backwards at techno. “what, she your girlfriend or something?” he said laughing.

“he’s not a girl, joseph.”

a swift slap across dreams face made techno wince.

”you never call me that, boy. i am your father.” 

dream nodded quickly and shrunk in on himself. joseph turned and faced techno again, observing him.

”and shes a cutter! she deserves it, don’t you think clay? at least she knows her place, all those freaks should.” joseph said, pointing to technos arm, laughing.

”fuck you!” dream yelled. he stepped infront of techno again, holding his arms back to shield him. 

his fathers face twisted with anger and dream quickly ran, pulling techno behind him.

”i should kill the fucker myself! freaks of nature, they are.” joseph shouted, following. “you dare speak back to me?”

dream quickly pushed techno out the door, following. he slammed the door and raced to his car, taking out his keys. he unlocked it, yelling at techno to get in. he climbed in the drivers seat and locked it right after both their doors shut.

his father was stumbling down the driveway, clearly drunk. dream sped out of the driveway and down the road, pulling off into an abandoned side of the neighborhood.

he parked and quickly spun to face techno. his face was emotionless and empty as dream wrapped him in a hug.

”he’s right.”

“no- no he’s not. don’t ever think like that.”

”i do deserve it.”

”what?”

”maybe i should die.” techno said under his breath. 

dream blinked, briefly wondering if he heard him correctly. he pulled back from the embrace and held technos shoulder. “techno. look at me.”

techno slowly raised his head and faced dream.

”never think like that. he’s a fucking dick, okay? i would never let him hurt you, and he’s wrong.” dream said confidently.

”he hurt you.” techno replied sadly.

”so what? we got out, it’s fine.” dream said. he pulled techno into another hug and ran a hand through his friends hair.

”can we go to my house? dad will understand.”

dream nodded and pulled away from the hug, driving towards technos house.


	5. guest bedrooms and thievery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sad sad sad   
> tw self harm not graphic, abuse implications, eating disorder stuff you know the drill

dream set his backpack down in the guest room. after telling phil the situation, he refused to let dream go back to that environment. he told him to go back and get the things he needed and quickly return, showing him to the guest bedroom.

he carefully set his clothes into the dresser and laid down on the bed. he was silent for a long time before he began to cry.

a knock on the door barely halted his sobs as wilbur pushed the door open and closed it behind him, rushing over to dream.

”hey, what’s wrong?” he asked softly, sitting beside the crying boy and wrapping him in a hug. “it’s alright, just me. breathe.”

dream continued to sob as he returned the hug. he had never realized how bony wilbur was; his spine and shoulder blades were protruding aggressively against his baggy hoodie and he had awful eyebags. he pushed aside the realization, and followed wilburs breathing. eventually, he calmed down enough to speak.

he wipes his eyes and pulled out of the hug, wrapping his arms around his torso. “my father nearly attacked techno. told him he was right for c-“

dream slapped a hand over his mouth and quickly cut off his sentence. he wasn’t sure if wilbur knew or not and presumed it best not to say.

”he was right for what?” wilbur said, confused. “you can tell me, i’ll keep him safe. we have our disagreements but that’s my brother, after all.”

”don’t tell him you found out from me. but uhm,” dream paused, considering the ways to say this. “he’s been sorta, like, cutting? only for the past few days but i don’t know. my father saw it and called him slurs and basically told techno he should die.” dreams voice lowered slightly and he added, “he said he thought my father was right about him.”

wilbur sat in terrified awe. “hold on? cutting?”

”yeah like, his arms.”

wilbur took a shaky breath and nodded. “okay. well uhm, thanks for telling me that. what was he calling tech?”

dream frowned. “he was calling him ‘she’ and the t slur. i yelled at him to fuck off and this happened.” he explained, gesturing to the bruise on his cheek and jaw.

wilbur looked infuriated. dream knew that techno and wilbur didn’t have the best relationship right now, but at the end of the day that was his brother.

”how badly are you hurt?”

”not bad. just some bruising over my ribs and this bruise on my face but everything else isn’t too bad.”

he nodded and looked at the wall across from the guest bed.

”dad made dinner, so be upstairs in about five minutes. ill run to technos room now and take any blades, since he’s helping set the table. keep him distracted, okay?” wilbur stood, moving towards the door and up the stairs, continuing down the hall to technos room.

he rummaged around until he found all the blades he could locate, a total of 6. one was a small blade from a pencil sharpener and the other five were brand new, all matching. same brand and all. he rushed to his room and deposited them in his guitar case before running back downstairs.

techno and dream were laughing at the table and tommy was taking pain relievers in the kitchen. phil was moving plates of food into the dining room as wilbur sat down.

”hey, dad? i’ve got homework, can i eat in my room?”

phil faultered and turned around to face his son. “oh uhm, we have a guest so let’s all eat together, yeah?”

wilbur clenched his fists under the table and gave the best passive aggressive smile he could as phil moved to the kitchen to grab another plate.

dinner was decently calm. techno never looked at wilbur directly and tommy cracked as many jokes as he could to lighten the mood.

wilbur pushed a piece of steak around his plate, chopping it up, making tiny patterns around his plate. dream was the first to notice, but deciding not to say anything. phil was second, giving wilbur a worried look. then techno and tommy.

”wilbur eat your food, not make a maze with it.” tommy said, shoveling food into his mouth.

”not hungry.” he explained. as if on queue, his stomach grumbled and techno looked at him for the first time since dinner began.

”you sure?” techno pestered.

wilbur gulped and forced a ”yes.” 

“try it! you haven’t had any.” tommy continued.

”no, i’m alright.”

”try it! cmon, it’s just steak.”

”i’m not hungry, tommy.”

”just one bite-“

”I SAID IM NOT HUNGRY!” he screamed, slamming his hands on the table. tommy and techno both clamped their hands over there ears, dream flinching.

”wilbur, go to your room. we need to have a talk, i’ll be up soon.” phil said with finality.

”gladly.” wilbur laughed slightly and stood up from the table, storming off down the hallway. tommy’s hands were pulling at his hair and dream was attempting to calm techno down. he was the only one, besides technos family, who knew his past.

phil reached out a hand to tommy, quick tommy clasped his own hands around, digging his nails into phil’s skin. phil didn’t mind at this point, letting tommy calm down.

eventually when the two kids were alright, he gave them instructions to clean up and he walked to wilburs room.

he knocked and opened the door slowly, seeing wilbur sat on his bed scrolling on his phone. phil closed the door and sat down beside his son.

”so, what was all that?” 

“he was being annoying.” wilbur said nonchalantly.

”he was telling you to eat. no one has such a visceral reaction to that unless somethings wrong.” phil folded his arms and looked around the room. he never realized how sad wilburs room was; posters of sad looking albums and song lyrics scrawled out on lined paper that hung around the room. it was almost entirely black, white, and red. wilbur also wore a red bracelet, which phil still didn’t understand.

”i was just annoyed. had a long day,” he muttered.

phil raised an eyebrow. “really?”

”yeah, no shit.” wilbur replied, laughing slightly. “do me a favor and stop looking so much into it.”

phil stood slowly and walked towards the door. “your first therapy appointment is wednesday. you don’t have to be honest with me, but don’t lie to her. she’s nice.”

and with that, phil left wilbur alone with his thoughts.


	6. hospitals suck

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> wilbur is admitted to the hospital and phil finds out abt techno OH MY onlypain

techno burst into the guest bedroom, hands trembling slightly.

”dream. where are they?” he demanded.

dream raised his head from the book he was reading and raised his eyebrow. “where are what?”

”my fucking- my blades. where did you hide them?” he pleaded.

”what? techno i didn’t take them.” dream replied calmly.

”you are the only one who knew so it had to be you, i went upstairs after dinner and they were gone.” he insisted.

dream shrugged and sat up. “is that really such a bad thing? i mean, i didn’t take them but why do you need them so bad if you said you won’t do it again?”

techno froze and stared at dream. his eyes went wide and he began to pace. “i just need them, okay? so where the fuck are they!” he yelled, walking towards dream.

”i have no clue. but thank god you don’t have them, if this is how you are acting.”

techno balled his fists and spun around. he then reached to his head, grabbing his hair and pulling at it. “so who took them?” he asked.

dream had never heard his friend this angry and it was terrifying him. he stood and carefully walked forwards, unraveling technos hands from his hair and pulling him into a hug.

”i don’t know, okay? do you want me to read to you, so you can calm down?”

techno mumbled something but eventually nodded into dreams shoulder. they sat on the bed and dream began reading fairytales.

upstairs, wilbur was unzipping his guitar case. he took out one of the new blades he’d found in technos room and smiled to himself. he double-checked his door was locked and he rolled up his sleeve. his arms were so scarred, there was hardly any room. he swiped over old scars until blood began to drip from his arm to the floor.

he smiled and laid down on his back, watching the blood hit the floor. he knew he wouldn’t die, he’d done worse. he was calm. everything was calm, at that moment. he soon drifted off to sleep.

only a room over, tommy and tubbo were sat by tommy’s window. tommy held two cigarettes in his hand and stared at tubbo.

”are you sure you want to try one? you’ll get addicted quick.” tommy asked, worry in his voice.

”yeah, why not? you smoke them, so i’ll be fine.” he replied happily.

”yeah, but i’m addicted tubbo.” tommy laughed a little and took a lighter from his pocket. he made space so tubbo could be closer to the window and he lit his cigarette, lighting tubbos soon after.

”so how do i, like, do this?” tubbo asked.

”okay just- you’ll probably cough, but watch me.” 

tommy took a drag and then blew the smoke out the window. he looked to tubbo and watched as he tried to replicate it, coughing slightly before blowing the smoke outside.

”see? that wasn’t so bad.” tubbo laughed and took another drag, tommy following suit.

they sat in silence for a few moments before tommy spoke up; “so? it’s kinda gross but it’s nice, right?” 

“yeah! i feel all light.” tubbo paused to take another drag before continuing. “i don’t have to worry about my problems like this, type of thing.”

tommy faultered. “that’s- okay, uhm. tubbo, never do drugs or smoke because you want to get away from life. that’s dangerous.”

tubbo rolled his eyes and continued smoking. he stared off at the treeline as tommy sighed and joined him.

and slowly, the sun dipped below the horizon and it was time for another day. tommy and tubbo slept peacefully, a gentle breeze coming in the window. wilbur had fallen asleep hours earlier, blood now dried on the floor. techno and dream both resided in the guest room, techno laying his head on dreams chest, having fallen asleep while he was reading. dream fell asleep soon after, his glasses still on.

phil rushed around all the rooms, waking up each boy for the day. he had gotten to everyone except wilbur, whose door was locked.

”wilbur? why is the door locked?” he asked confused. “get up, time for school.”

he heard a faint yell and figured wilbur was up. he ran downstairs to prepare breakfast as tubbo bounded down the stairs, glowing.

”g’morning phil!” he said, sliding into one of the tables at the table.

”morning tubbo! is tommy up?”

”yeah, sorta. he’s slow at getting ready.” tubbo explained, scrolling on his phone. techno and dream came up the stairs from the basement as phil began to set plates around the table.

techno mumbled a greeting and dream smiled at phil. they each took their spots at the table as phil called out for wilbur, telling him breakfast was ready. tommy soon joined them at the table.

”i’ll be down soon! i have to shower,” wilbur announced from the top of the stairs.

the boys at the table complained about how warm it was, asking phil to turn on the AC, which he did. somehow it was still boiling. california will do that to a house, after all. especially right before summer. that’s why when wilbur came down the stairs ten minutes later in a giant hoodie and sweatpants, phil raised an eyebrow.

”odd outfit choice. it’s 95 degrees out, wil.” phil said, clearing the table. everyone had already eaten, besides wilbur, who he left a plate for.

”yeah, yeah. whatever. we need to leave before we are late,”

”eat your breakfast first.” phil moved to the fridge, getting bottles of water for each of the boys.

”oh uhm, ill eat at school. we should leave-“ he insisted.

”no, eat your breakfast wilbur.” phil replied. 

tommy, tubbo, techno, and dream all looked extremely confused. phil motioned for them to go to the car, and they accepted quickly. they grabbed their backpacks and sprinted outside.

”dad, you’re being weird.”

phil sat beside wilbur, folding his hands. “i’ve not seen you eat breakfast since freshman year, wilbur. you don’t buy lunch most days, i’ve been checking. and you barely eat anything at dinner.” phil left no room for arguing as the leaned back in his chair. he had been confirming his suspicions for weeks, only growing more and more alarmed.

“no, i bring granola bars and-“

”cut the bullshit, wilbur. you’ve lived with me since you were 13. you think i didn’t notice?” phil gestured to wilbur and his small frame. “you’re fucking tiny. you get pissed off whenever anyone mentions it, though. so what is this? is there an issue with food? are you depressed? are you anorex-“

”don’t fucking say that!” wilbur screamed, hitting the table. “i’m not.. that. i’m not depressed. there’s no issue, so back off. i’m staying home today; i don’t feel good.” he insisted, storming away from the table aggressively.

phil watched sadly before going out to the car. he drove the boys to school silently, everyone a little nervous. he dropped them off and watched as techno and dream laughed together and how tommy and tubbo ducked behind a remote side of the building. that was strange to him, but he had bigger issues.

he drove home quickly and raced inside and up to wilburs room. he knocked and tried to open the door, finding it locked.

”unlock the door, wilbur. please?”

wilbur quickly shuffled around a few things and opened the door. “yes?”

”you are boiling alive. why don’t you wear something less warm?” phil asked, knowingly. he leaned against the doorframe as sweat dripped off wilburs forehead.

”uhm. i’m not warm.”

“you are sweating, wil.” phil said. he raised an eyebrow.

“i was working out.” wilbur explained, rolling his eyes.

“in that outfit?”

wilbur mumbled and sat down at his desk. phil followed, sitting on a spare chair.

”alright, that’s it.” phil took a deep breath, “let’s go to the hospital. if you won’t admit you have a problem, i’m sure they will.”

wilbur recoiled and instantly shook his head. “no! what the fuck?”

”either you go willingly to the hospital or i call them to come get you. you need help.” phil insisted sadly.

”fuck you!” he screamed. standing up. he gripped his hair out of nervousness, and when his hands pulled away, so did clumps of his hair.

phils eyes widened and he stood up. “come on.” he grabbed wilburs elbow gently and lead him down the stairs and to the car, wilbur shaking nervously the whole time. phil started the car and sped off.

”so what’s the issue today?” the doctor asked, writing some things down.

”i suspect he is anorexic.” phil choked on the word a bit, composing himself.

wilbur winced at the word and wrapped his arms around himself, tears streaming down his face.

the doctor flipped through some papers and picked one out, clipping it into the clipboard. “alrighty, i’m gonna ask you some questions okay, wilbur? and we will take his nutritional levels, based on hair composition and other things like that.” the lady smiled and offered a hand to wilbur, which he took. “it’s okay, kid. you’re gonna be alright. just breath.”

the doctor went through the questions, advising wilbur not to lie. he slipped a few lies on certain questions and waited while the doctor read over the test.

”we need to weigh you, now. if it makes you feel more comfortable, i can leave while you take off the hoodie and sweatpants or give you a blanket, but we need the accurate number.” she explained.

wilbur shook his head and carefully removed his hoodie and sweatpants. phil immedietly broke out crying as he saw wilburs ribs hit violently against his skin, and his sons hands practically blue. he winced, hearing his father cry. he stepped on the scale and the nurse frowned.

”144 pounds. he’s 6’5, right?”

phil nodded and wilbur slipped back on his clothes, settling onto the chair again.

”wilbur, do you know how severely underweight that is? considering your height, that is very low.” the doctor explained sadly. 

wilbur nodded, staring at the floor. phil was crying and the nurse was writing things down sadly.

”when did you last eat?” she asked, turning a page on her clipboard.

”uhm. two maybe three days ago?”

phil sobbed loudly as the doctor wrote things down. “this is going to be hard to hear. but i would suggest he is admitted to the eating disorder treatment ward at western mental facility.”

”no! i’m not going there. i’m going home and i’m gonna see my brothers and i’m gonna-“

”thank you. when can i have him admitted?” phil said, cutting him off.

”NO!” wilbur shrieked. he jumped up attempted to open the door, forgetting how heavy it was. phil wrapped his arms around his sons shoulders and pulled him back to the chairs. he cried and screamed as the doctor left to make a phone call to the facility.

phil gently ran his hands through his sons hair, watching strands fall away. he frowned and talked to wilbur calmly.

the doctor returned, taking a seat by the counter. “luckily, they have a few open beds. they can accept him as soon as an hour from now. if you want to go there and get him admitted now, you can. they have to do a lot of diagnosis’s before he gets to his room, so it will work out time wise.”

wilbur sobbed as phil agreed and they left the doctors office. phil got up the directions to the facility and drove quickly.

upon arrival, they took wilbur and phil into a small examination room. one thing the doctor at the last place hadn’t noticed was wilburs arms. so when they went to weigh him again, phil nearly started crying again.

”these are new; when were these?” he asked, writing things down.

”yesterday.” wilbur mumbled.

”i- i took his blade. how-“

”techno cuts now too. probably my fault. i took his blades, one so he would stop and two so i could have them.”

phil dropped his head into his hands. soon, wilbur was saying goodbye and being sent to his room.


	7. drugs and dumbasses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> just a reminder this is all platonic!!!!!
> 
> phil tells the boys wilburs gone :(

phil waited quietly at the dining table. he had planned what he would say over and over in his head, but he wasn’t sure he’d ever be ready.

and he wasn’t, not even when techno, tommy, tubbo, and dream came in the door. tommy and tubbo were laughing and pushing each other lightly, while dream and techno talked quietly. they caught sight of phil, who was sat with his hands folded. 

all four boys stopped moving and phil cleared his throat. 

“sit, please. all of you,” he said patiently. 

tommy began to hyperventilate and his hands shook violently. “who died? did someone die? it was wilbur wasn’t it? oh my god wilburs dead.”

”tommy, no ones dead.” he spoke softly, opening his arms. tommy fell into the hug and tried to follow his fathers breathing.

techno, tubbo, and dream room seats at the table as phil moved his hands through tommy’s hair, calming him down. he remembered how he would do that with wilbur, and how the hair would fall from his sons scalp. he pushed away the thought and spoke again.

”wilbur has been hospitalized. he’s not hurt, not dying, he’s in the mental facility. they-“ phil’s voice broke and he continued somberly. “they admitted him to the eating disorder ward.”

dreams jaw dropped and tommy had moved from his father to sitting beside tubbo, giving him a side hug.

”eating disorder ward?” techno asked. “he has an eating disorder?”

”yeah.. he’s extremely underweight and he needed help. techno? can i speak to you in my office? tommy, tubbo, and dream, you can go your separate ways, ill come speak to you all soon.” phil directed.

techno nodded and followed his dad to his office. he sat down on the small sofa in the corner as his dad sat at his desk.

”so, when did you start cutting?”

technos eyes went wide and he tried to speak, but no words would come out.

”i’m not mad, tech. wilbur took your blades, but if you could give me any you have left i’d appreciate it.” phil folded his hands and leaned back in the chair.

”that’s where they went! that little dickhead.” techno muttered. “i don’t have any more. they are probably in his room. and i guess it started the day everything with wil happened. i wanted to understand. but only dream knew.. so that means he told wilbur.” he said, frowning.

phil nodded slowly. “most likely.” he paused before continuing. “how are you feeling now?”

”im okay, i guess. it kinda sucks but i figured something was wrong with wil.” he replied. “can i go now?”

phil nodded and techno ran downstairs to dreams room. he opened the door and immedietly crumpled to the floor, sobbing. dream rushed over, kneeling infront of him.

”tech, hey! it’s just me. breathe, okay?” 

techno sobbed loudly, struggling to catch any air. dream sat down beside techno, wrapping his arms around technos shoulders. 

“i should have done something. i should have watched closer.” he said through sobs.

dream just rubbed his back and let him cry on his shoulder until he fell asleep.

upstairs, however, tommy and tubbo were taking a very different approach. tommy had been smoking since he left the table and he ended up on harder substances.

”tommy? slow down.. like you once told me, drugs aren’t to get away from life and problems-“

”shut th’ fuck up. you don’t know what it’s like,” he slurred. he had also been drinking, a nearly empty flask in his hand that had been refilled twice. he stumbled towards the window and took another sip.

tubbo stood beside him, holding out his hand. tommy passed him the flask and a cigarette. he took a swig then lit the cigarette, smoking out the window.

this went on for awhile until tommy began to cry. he leaned against the edge of his bed and curled in on himself. tubbo took a seat next to him, slightly drunk and not really caring. he wrapped an arm around tommy’s shoulder and allowed his friend to lean against him. tommy rambled and rambled for hours, tubbo simply sitting and listening, nodding along. eventually, like the pair downstairs, they fell asleep.

wilbur had no one to comfort him. that’s what he thought, anyway. when he entered his room for the first time, a small man was sat on the other side of the room. he was extremely thin, like wilbur. he wore a multicolored block hoodie but the strings were taken when he was admitted.

”welcome to hell,” the boy said laughing. “i’m karl.”

Wilbur remained silent for a moment before sitting down on his bed. “i’m wilbur. so, how bad is it here?”

”oh it’s hell on earth. but don’t worry, you just gotta find someone to self destruct with. and that’s why you have me!” karl said, smiling. “my last roommate was that person for me, but since he’s gone i got you! lucky me!” 

wilbur laughed a little and karl waved him over (their beds were side by side). it was pretty dark by now, as he’d spent hours getting examined. he walked over to the boys bed and sat beside him.

they were silent for a few moments before karl spoke up. “what’s on your mind, wil?”

”i’m just scared.” wilbur said softly.

karl frowned and held his arms open, allowing wilbur to fall into the hug. “i know. it’s really scary but.. just know, you got me. and i don’t know how soon they will let me out, so you’ll have me for awhile!” he smiled and laid back on the bed, wilbur laying beside him.

tears streamed down wilburs face as karl pulled him into his side, allowing him to cry onto his colorful hoodie. wilbur told karl his life story; where he was from, how he got here, his childhood. and karl shared the same information in return. he learned that karl was originally a talented singer, like himself. they shared a love of music and all things artistic. he felt overjoyed to have gotten a good roommate who was fine with hugs and things of the sort.

karl explained how the place worked, check ins, monitored meals, group therapy, ect. he reminded wilbur they’d be checked on every fifteen minutes; and just on queue, a nurse popped her head in. wilbur reacted quickly and jumped into his bed, pretending to sleep. the nurse left quickly and the two boys laughed. they ended up making a fake person out of pillows on karl’s bed so wilbur wouldn’t be alone. karl was smaller than wilbur, so he was shielded from the nurses view whenever they popped in. and don’t get it twisted, they were just friends. karl knew wilbur didn’t wanna be alone, based on the life story he’d heard, so he made sure wilbur would never feel alone again. at least, not here.

they spoke into the late hours of the night, eventually drifting off to bed.


	8. cracking noses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> wilbur beats a guy up
> 
> tw f slur

karl pushed a fork around his plate, nurses watching like a hawk. wilbur simply stared at his plate. he glanced over to another table for a moment and saw a group of people whispering and looking at him. he balled his fists on the table and karl quickly took notice.

”wilbur? what’s wrong?” he asked.

wilbur gestured to the table a few feet away. “apparently they’ve got something to say, not sure why they don’t just fucking say it. why don’t i just ask them?” he said with anger.

karl dropped his fork and reached out a hand, resting it on wilburs’. “wil. it’s not worth it, alright? don’t mess with those people.” karl’s voice wavered and he shook slightly.

wilbur raised an eyebrow. “what’d they do, karl?” he asked patiently.

karl removed his hand and crossed his arms, sinking in his chair. “they mess with me sometimes, i guess. gave me a pretty nasty cut and some bruises,” he said, gesturing to his jawline. a faded bruise rested from his jaw to his neck.

his fists balled again and rage overtook him. how could someone ever do that to another person? especially karl! he’d never hurt anyone, as far as he knew. wilbur flung his chair backward and stood, walking over to the other table.

”the fuck is wrong with you?” he shouted. “you stay away from karl, okay?” 

“okay, 144.” they replied, laughing. “little fag had it coming.”

wilbur barely realized what he was doing when he swung. a crack under his knuckles sent pain through his hands, but he didn’t care at that moment. karl rushed over, trying to pull him back. nurses and staff were holding him back by his arms and shoulders as he screamed.

”say it again you fucking asshole! say it again, see what happens.” he yelled. blood dropped off of his knuckles as he was pulled from the room.

he had gotten in a lot of trouble and nearly transferred for the attack, having to eat dinner in a secluded room. eventually, he was cleared to go back to his room with karl.

he walked in, escorted by a nurse. they knew he wouldn’t hurt karl, as he had only hurt someone in defense of his friend. the nurse walked out a few minutes later and karl immedietly ran to wilbur.

he examined his friends’ knuckles as he began to ask questions. “wilbur! you idiot! why’d you hit him?” he cried.

”he hurt you. also called you some slurs in the process, apparently.” he paused before muttering, “called me 144. as an insult.”

karl chose to ignore the first part, diving back into the questions. “144?”

”thats my weight. i’m 6’5, so it’s underweight. not sure why that’s an insult in the ED ward, but that’s not important right now.” wilbur leaned back against the bed frame and karl spoke up again.

he laughed lightly. “you and alex aren’t too different. he nearly beat the shit out of a similar guy when he got here, too. same reason.” he paused and sighed. “i’m sorry he said that about you.”

wilbur shrugged and scooted to one side of the bed, allowing karl to lie beside him. karl leaned slightly against wilburs shoulder and smiled. “you cracked his nose pretty good.”

they broke out laughing despite the fact the situation wasn’t to laugh at. eventually, when they calmed down, they got into their late night talking mood.

”hey karl? who’s alex?”

”oh. he was my previous roommate; he’s this little guy but he insisted that ‘if you mess with karl you mess with me,’ which was sweet.” he explained quietly. 

”aw.” wilbur replied. “so you’ve been here awhile, then?”

”yeah. about five months now. alex was only here for three and he left a few days ago.” he tapped his hand against his leg idly and went on. “before that, i had some guy named clay.”

wilbur raised an eyebrow, asking, ”oh, my brother knows someone named clay. what was he like?”

”he was super cool! tall, maybe 6’3? apparently his dads an asshole. he always talked about a kid from his school with pink hair. he spoke pretty fondly of him. he said that he was too scared to talk to him, but the day before he left he told me he’d give it a shot.” karl smiled, remembering. he stared up towards the ceiling.

wilbur froze, turning his head to face karl. “pink hair? and hold on- dads an asshole, 6’3.. sounds like dream. did this kid have a name? the one he wanted to be friends with?”

”started with a t or something. funny name, i know that much. clay talked about him like he put the damn stars in the sky, despite not even being his friend yet.” karl smiled and folded his hands. “it was sweet.”

”holy shit, that’s my brother. techno, was that the name?”

”yes! techno. that was it. short for technoblade or something,” karl said, snapping his fingers.

”that’s my brother!” wilbur said laughing. “wow. clay lives with us right now, he’s best friends with tech. he ran away and he’s staying with us until things blow over.”

”holy shit! that’s crazy. when you get out let clay know where he can reach me, okay? my instagram is karl jacobs, with a k.” he said, adding the last part.

wilbur nodded and laughed lightly. “what a small world.”

karl heard footsteps approaching the door and jumped into his bed easily. they’d practiced this routine since wilbur got here. as soon as the nurse was gone, karl returned to sit by wilbur.

”i mean, technos probably not the biggest fan of me right now. i sold him out to dad for cutting.” wilbur put one arm behind his head and sighed.

”if this kids as amazing as clay said, good. you gotta keep him around.” karl smiled and continued. “i think clay would literally implode if techno did anything like that. it’s good you got him help!”

wilbur nodded and turned to face karl, laying on his side. “when do you think they will let us out of here?”

”me? maybe a few months. you? probably two or three months. that sounds like a long time, but recovery takes about minimum three months. at least, physical recovery.” karl shuddered, “unless you don’t follow their plans. that eventually leads to being tubed.”

”ew. have you ever been tubed?”

”four times. it sucks, but i’m doing better than i was when i was admitted. i was about 97 pounds then, and i’m 5’9 so that’s like. really scary to think about. doctors said if it had been any longer i probably would have hit the dirt.” he laughed slightly and sighed.

”i’m glad you’re still here. who’d give the boys hugs if you weren’t around little man?” he said, ruffling karl’s hair. they both laughed.

soon, karl got up, replicating the fake person in his bed and they repeated the routine from last night, falling asleep side by side, wilbur shielding karl from the nurses line of vision.


	9. apartments and lies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the homies being homies 
> 
> rlly sad bc karl and wilbur r relapsing together :(
> 
> WARNING: if you are recovering, please skip this chapter. recovery is beautiful and i’m so proud of you all! this is just me dumping my disordered thoughts into a forum online.

wilbur did his best to avoid trouble at the hospital; he only ended up in a few more fights. at the end of his stay, which amounted to four months, he was surprised to hear dream would be moving in for longer than expected. 

he didn’t mind though. he was pissed that he’d missed tommy’s birthday and graduating junior year, but he was even more pissed that he’d gained weight while at the hospital. karl and him ended up getting released near the same time, and he invited karl over to his house once he got home. karl accepted quickly and that’s why the day wilbur got home, he came home with a guest.

he opened the front door and stepped inside, hearing talking from the kitchen. 

“upstairs is this way; if my family’s up there you’ll get to meet them.” wilbur explained quietly. he walked up the stairs and he saw the five boys who were usually at the house around the dining room table.

”karl?”

”clay!” he shrieked, sprinting into a hug with his old friend.

”how the hell did you get here?” he asked, shocked.

”wilbur was my roommate.” he explained, slightly muffled by dreams hoodie.

dream laughed and continued, ”they finally let you out, huh?”

”yeah! nine months of my life wasted but yknow.” karl laughed and pulled away from the hug. phil was staring, confused.

”oh! dad, this is karl. he was my roommate at the hospital and he’s like, my best friend.” he explained. he stood beside karl and continued introductions; “you already know dream, that’s tubbo, not sure where tommy is, and techno. from the sounds of it though, you heard a lot about techno when dream was your roommate.”

dreams face flushed and he spun to face wilbur. “wha- shut up!” 

wilbur laughed and a confused look rose over technos face. 

“i’ll explain later, wheres tommy-“

”wilbur!” tommy shrieked, jumping down the stairs. he practically knocked wilbur over with the hug he gave, but wilbur didn’t mind. “you dipshit! never do that again.”

wilbur laughed lightly and hugged his younger brother. “i won’t, i won’t.” 

soon, phil, techno, dream, tubbo and even karl (he seemed to be accepted into the family rather quickly) joined the hug.

”so! who wants to watch a movie?” 

karl sat inbetween wilbur and dream, each of them slinging an arm over karl’s shoulder. techno sat on the other side of dream, curled up to his side. tommy refused to be more than a foot away from wilbur, so he was clinging to wilburs arm like a lifeline. beside tommy, was tubbo who was practically already asleep against tommy’s shoulder. phil sat beside tubbo, smiling.

the movie wasn’t of much interest to anyone, so they all talked quietly among themselves.

”explain! what the hell did you mean he ‘knew about me’?” techno gestured to karl.

wilbur laughed and dream glared at him before joining the laughing.

”the guy would never shut up about you! he was all like, ‘there’s this guy in my art class he’s so cool and epic and i wanna be his friend blah blah blah’.” karl broke out laughing and techno looked at dream.

”karl! what the hell! what happens in the mental hospital stays in the mental hospital! bros code,” dream slapped karl’s arm lightly and began to laugh too.

”so wait- dream was karl’s roommate, then you were his roommate? that’s crazy!” tommy turned to face wilbur and pointed at karl.

”yeah! oh! and remember alex, from our history class? start of the year? guy went practically missing for a few months?” dream and techno nodded while karl smiled. “he was also karl’s roommate!”

everyone laughed lightly and eventually, they all fell asleep on the couch, phil tossing a blanket over them.

wilbur woke up around three AM. it really hit him how much weight he’d gained and he felt sick. he untangled his body from karl and tommy’s grasps, hoping they wouldnt wake up. karl was a super light sleeper, so it was almost futile.

he made his way to his bedroom and located a familiar journal. he walked to the bathroom and smiled that the scale was still there.

he took off his hoodie and sweatpants and stepped on the scale. he gasped at the number and stepped off the scale. he slid on his sweatpants, leaving off his hoodie as he was quite warm. he slid down the wall of the bathroom, opening the journal. he wrote down the numbers and planned out his intake for the next week. it was summer, so he could easily just say he was going on a trip and crash at his friends’ places.

slowly, the door opened and a sleepy looking karl entered the bathroom. he rubbed his eyes and immedietly noticed the journal. wilbur snapped the book shut and karl frowned.

”wil?”

”yeah?”

”was that what i think it was?”

”no.”

”yeah it was.”

”no!”

karl paused before blurting, “can i join you?”

wilbur frowned. “karl.. you are supposed to be getting better.”

”so are you.” he bit back.

“i don’t know karl.”

”please. it’s better to not be alone during it all.”

Wilbur nodded a little and gestured to the floor beside him. karl took a seat beside wilbur and leaned into his side. wilbur pulled him into a hug. 

karl was silent for a moment before he spoke. “how do we do this? your dad is gonna be watching you like a hawk. my parents don’t really give a shit, but that guy? he’s watching closely.”

wilbur opened the book again, writing it down. “we have to avoid being here as much as possible. i turn eighteen at the start of senior year, so why don’t we get an apartment?”

karl frowned a little. ”thats so expensive, though.”

”ive been saving up since i was 9. i have more than enough, and i’ll get a job.”

karl slowly nodded. “what do we do until then?”

wilbur frowned and shuffled a bit. he hated the idea of this illness taking him away from his family again. ”we just gotta avoid being here best we can. let’s get a job for summer, save up, and avoid my dad as much as possible. i love him but he can’t know.”

karl nodded and smiled. “god, i shouldn’t be this happy to go back to it.”

wilbur shrugged, ”we can’t really control it, can we? i mean, as soon as we are 18, no one can really stop us. one rule: if we are ever about to fuckin’ die, we don’t let that happen.”

“agreed. let’s start applying for jobs tomorrow and everything we save goes towards our fund, yeah?” karl proposed.

wilbur nodded. “i feel kinda bad for this. like, we are supposed to get better, and you were! but now..”

”wilbur i’ve not been getting better.” karl said softly.

”what?”

karl winced before explaining. ”at the hospital, i befriended one of the nurses. he’d let me go to the bathroom after meals and purge. he’s kinda fucked up for that, but i’m grateful.“

”damn.” he whispered. 

“so how do we hide this from everyone? especially clay. he knows my tricks and since he knows my parents don’t care, he’ll be watching me.” karl frowned at the idea of betraying his friend.

wilbur paused, thinking a moment. “big clothes and hats. i wore those even before my ed, so i doubt phil or dream will catch on.” 

”okay.” karl said sleepily. “g’night, love you.”

”love you too karl.” wilbur whispered, running a hand through his friends hair. he had a sick sensation of pride coursing through his veins. the hospital failed.

at around four AM, wilbur got up and carried karl to his room. he set karl down on the bed and began to make a bed on the floor, not wanting to just crawl in next to him without the official okay. karl woke up quickly, though, because he was just such a light sleeper.

”wil? why are you on the floor?”

”oh, you weren’t awake and i didn’t know if you wanted me up there so i kinda just.. sat down here.” he replied awkwardly.

karl held out his arms before speaking. “come here, it’s cold. cuddle the homies, that’s the real bro code.”

wilbur laughed and got off the floor, laying down beside karl who clung to him like he was a tree and karl was a koala. wilbur was almost thankful he’d gone to the hospital, because he ended up meeting karl.

”g’night.” he mumbled, drifting off.

”goodnight karl.”


	10. just like him

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tw for the usual u know the drill

wilbur, the very next day, applied for a multitude of jobs. they were effective at keeping him busy and also good for money. he landed a job at an electronics shop and karl worked across the road as a receptionist.

wilbur raced down the stairs, hoping his dad wasn’t home. he’d managed to avoid him since his and karl’s interaction, which was insanely lucky. he packed as many hours of work as he could into his schedule, just to make sure.

he landed at the bottom on the stairs and grabbed his coat, about to run out the door before he heard a shout.

”wil?”

he winced and spun around, walking to the kitchen. “hey dad! i’m late for work, can’t talk.”

”okay! hug before you go, though.”

wilbur didn’t think much of it and wrapped his arms around his father. phil froze once the embrace began.

”wilbur?”

wilbur pulled away from the hug, confused. “yeah?”

”why are you so bony?” he asked quietly.

wilbur forced himself to collect his thoughts before speaking. “the hospital didn’t make me gain one hundred pounds, dad. i’m still a little scrawny.”

phil looked concerned and it made wilbur feel sick. he scratched his head. “i have to go to work, bye dad!” he shouted, running out the door.

work went by horribly slow, but he and karl ended up walking home together. it was about a mile walk but it burnt calories so he was all for it.

”i think dads catching on.” wilbur said tiredly. his legs ached and he desperately wanted to lay down under the stars and allow the chilly air to seep into his bones. but he knew he had to keep walking.

”oh no. what’d he say?” karl asked softly. 

“said i felt bony. made up some excuse and ran out the door, though.”

karl nodded and they turned a corner. karl spent most of his time at wilburs house and it was ending up to be pretty nice, so he didn’t mind the walk. 

the rest of the walk was silent. wilbur unlocked the house door and crept in, karl at his heels. he walked up the stairs and was nearly to his room when phil flicked on the hall light. 

“work gets out at 10. it’s 10:40, what took so long?” he interrogated.

wilvur laughed awkwardly and scratched his head. “we uh- we walked home. it was nice out.”

phil raised an eyebrow and he spotted karl.

”karl! hey.” he smiled and waved. “i know you two missed dinner so i can make something if you want?”

”no that’s okay! we got food on the way home.” karl let the lie slip past his lips easily.

phil hesitated but eventually nodded. wilbur and karl sprinted into wilburs room and sat on the floor, holding the journal. they each began to log their intakes and the calories they burnt. they barely heard the footsteps coming up to their door, not realizing until the door opened.

”hey wi-“

dream stared down at the two boys and the journal.

”what are you writing?” he said hesitantly.

”just calculating work hours and how much we should make this week. why?” wilbur said, closing the journal.

”can i read it?”

”uhm. no?” wilbur replied. karl tried to stop his hands from shaking from the cold that remained deep in his bones as dream took a seat beside them.

”wilbur, so help me god i will tell phil right now.” dream held a hand out for the journal, speaking in a hushed voice.

”tell him what? that we know how to do taxes?”

”i’ll tell him that karl’s sick. that enough for you?” dream waited for the journal patiently as karl’s eyes went wide.

”sick?”

”anorexic, karl.” dream explained.

wilbur hit a hand aggressively on the ground, causing dream to flinch. “i will send you right back to where you came from. i can get you sent out of this house faster than you can say fuck.”

”fuck.” dream said confidently.

karl curled his knees to his chest and began to hyperventilate.

wilbur glared at dream. ”you can fuck with me all you want but you aren’t gonna threaten to tell on karl. what are you, 11?”

”seventeen, actually.” dream laughed and leaned backwards, drawing his hand back. “or would techno like to know? how about tommy? you either let me read it or i tell all of them my suspicions.” he threatened.

karl continued hyperventilating. wilbur wrapped his arms around karl and glared at dream. “follow my breathing, karl. it’s okay.” he muttered. “look what you did, dream.”

“i don’t want him in here.” karl cried into wilburs hoodie.

”okay, karl. wait here, okay?”

wilbur stood, leaving karl and dragging dream behind him outside. 

“you fucking say anything, i will ruin your life. ill start by telling techno. then i’ll tell dad. and then i’ll tell tommy and tubbo, the kids who look up to you more than anything. then you’ll loose karl and i. then i will make your life hell.” wilbur whispered. “ill tell phil you hit karl. i’ll tell phil you’re just like your deadbeat dad.”

dream balled his fists and glared at wilbur.

wilbur leaned close to dreams ear and whispered, ”you don’t want that, now do you? run along. go to your room.” 

“you are fucked up.” dream replied before running back inside and to his room. wilbur smiled and returned to his room.

karl immedietly engulfed him in a hug, nearly knocking him over. he cried loudly as wilbur returned the hug, holding him close.

”it’s okay, karl. he’s not gonna say anything.” wilbur comforted.

karl nodded and wilbur lead him to bed, letting him lay down. he waited for karl’s approval before laying down next to him and falling asleep.

dream flung open his door and slammed it, punching his fist through the wall. tubbo jumped back, crumpling to the ground and defensively raising his arms infront of his face.

“tubbo? what are you doing in here?”

he clasped his hands onto his hair and shakily replied, “needed a hoodie. tommy’s were all dirty, and he said to get a spare from the basement.”

dream kneeled infront of tubbo. “i’m sorry, i’m not mad at you. it’s okay, just me. i wouldn’t hurt you, tubbo.”

tubbo nodded and shakily stood, running back to tommy’s room. 

tommy immedietly went protective mode when tubbo entered the room shaking.

”tubbo! what happened?” he asked quickly, rushing over.

tubbo simply shook his head and wrapped his arms around his own stomach.

”toby. look at me,” tommy said softly. when tubbo looked up, he said, “what happened?”

”dream- he-,” tubbo choked on the words. “he just- punched a hole in the wall and slammed a door and-“

tommy frowned and hugged tubbo. he lead them to the window and took out two cigs. he lit them both and handed one to tubbo.

he calmed down quickly and smoked out the window. tommy finished his cig and took a vape pen from his pocket.

“nic or THC?”

”thc.” he said, taking a large inhale.

tubbo and tommy took turns inhaling from the pen before they forgot completely about the scary situation minutes before. they fell asleep right by the window.


	11. ambulances and blood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the boys r dying will they live ? maybe idk this ones a rough chapter

wilbur stared idly at the ceiling. his thoughts were facing.

karl was the first person he let touch him for more than two seconds. he never let anyone else do this because of two things: he didn’t want them to feel his bones and he also didn’t want them to feel his fat. 

karl had such a kind heart. it almost hurt when wilbur was envious of how small his friend was. they were pushing each other closer and closer to death but somehow it felt normal.

tears slipped down his face and he simply let them. the tears slid from his face onto karl’s cheek, who was resting his head on wilburs shoulder.

karl was exhausted. wilbur knew he wouldn’t wake up. it was just strange how he was repulsed by being touched, but for once he didn’t mind.

he laughed a little at the stupidness of it all. he was just being hugged, not stabbed. he wanted karl to get better, he did. but they made this grave and now they had to lay in it.

morning slowly rolled around and karl began to stir. he mumbled goodmorning before the two went off to the bathroom for their morning weighing ritual. they each took turns changing out of their hoodies and sweatpants and stepping on the scale, writing down the numbers. something in wilbur felt wrong. his head was aching and his ears wouldn’t stop ringing. 

he could barely hear anything by the time he went downstairs after getting ready. he was sitting at the table waiting for karl when phil walked in.

he could see phil talking but everything was blurred. his head felt foggy and the ringing just kept growing louder. phil gave a concerned look and approached his son. wilbur, despite his better judgement, attempted to stand up. his vision went black and he hit the ground with a thud.

karl walked down the stairs looking at his phone. he as about to call for wilbur when phil screamed.

he rushed over to his friend, shaking him. his breathing was awfully shallow. by now, the rest of the house had woken up and was running to the scene. 

dream arrived a moment after karl and dropped his phone, running to wilbur. he immedietly checked his pulse and began to panic.

tommy and tubbo came to the scene after dream. tommy began to scream and hyperventilate, causing techno to run downstairs. 

dream immedietly looked to karl. “how many yesterday?”

karl thought quickly and replied. “i think 142?”

”okay. days before?” 

“never above 200, from what i know.”

”what the hell are you two on about? techno, call an ambulance.” phil said between sobs.

“calories. he’s sick, has been since he got home. he’s not been getting better. neither has karl.”

karl gasped and began pouring denials. tommy quickly cut them off.

”you LET him do this, karl? fuck you!” tommy screamed, hitting karl harshly across the face. “get the fuck out of here!”

”tommy!” techno shouted.

”no! he let wilbur kill himself like this!” he continued screaming. 

karl stumbled back and techno quickly pulled tommy backwards into the living room. 

“i- no, no i didn’t. i wouldn’t, right?” karl pleaded.

”get the fuck out you monster!” tommy screamed.

karl hesitated before running outside. he heard the sirens approaching and he ran out to the road, directing them up the driveway. he raced back inside after the medics and collapsed beside wilbur.

dream stared at karl. “i told you. i fucking told you. now he’s fucking dying. we could have helped you guys!” he shouted.

karl’s brain was running so fast. he wasn’t sure what to do, and he quickly lost consciousness as well: the entire situation had stressed him out to the point of passing out.

the medics quickly split into two groups, taking wilbur and karl to the hospital in separate ambulances. dream sat in karl’s ambulance and phil in wilburs.

phil stared at his son and his sons best friend only beds apart. the doctors had done as much as they could, but he still didn’t know if wilbur would make it.

a doctor slowly entered the room, a somber look on his face.

”i’m sorry, sir.”

phils eyes went wide. “no. no- he’s going to live, right?” he pleaded. “tell me he’s going to live.”

“he might, but chances are slim. he’s in a medically induced coma as we try to counteract the organ failure that’s beginning. he’s got a tube and a glucose drip, but that’s all we can do for now. his body will either accept the nutrients or deny them.”

phil began to sob, holding his sons hand. “and what about the other boy?”

”he’s in just about as bad a state. his body seems to be accepting small portions of the nutrients so it’s possible he could wake up. the situation is much more dire for your son, i’m afraid.”

shouts from the hallway caused phil to look up. tommy, tubbo, techno, and dream were all entering the room. tommy, tubbo, and techno raced to wilbur, staring at him.

”he’s going to live, right dad?”

phil frowned.

”dad?” tommy asked. “no. he’s not gonna die. he can’t!” tommy pleaded, staring at wilburs pale body.

”tommy, he’s.. he’s bad. his body needs time to accept or deny the nutrients, but if it denies them..” phil paused, looking down at wilbur. “if it denies them, wilburs gone.”

tommy began to sob, crashing to the floor beside his brothers bed. tubbo sat calmly next to him, trying to reassure him. dream was asking the doctor questions about karl and he looked just as distraught.

techno spoke up, finally. “he’s going to die, isn’t he.” he stated.

phil inhaled sharply before replying. ”we don’t know, tech-“

”and it’s karl’s fault.”

“no, techno. wil did this himself-“ phil protested.

”karl did this.” techno insisted.

techno turned and approached karl’s bed. he stared at the boy.

”he killed wilbur.” he stated, emotionlessly.

”no-“ dream started, being cut off immedietly. 

“you did too, dream! i thought i could trust you. but you knew and didn’t fucking tell us?” he shouted. “you are just as much at fault as this fucker!” he pointed to karl and spun around, back to dream. “we let you in our house. we saved you. and you let him die.”

dream was quiet for a moment. “wilbur let himself die. maybe if you cared you would have noticed too.”

techno spun around and rage overtook him. he walked around karl’s bed and the blood on his hands didn’t stop him until he was being dragged away.


	12. rural nevada

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the boys escape and run away pogchamp!!!!

wilburs state was relatively idle. updates came and went, but there wasn’t much to know. all he knew was that his head hurt like hell.

he slowly opened his eyes, groaning at the realization he was in the hospital. “damn. i really did it again, didn’t i?” he muttered to himself, laughing.

”wilbur?” tommy said, shocked.

wilbur twisted his head and his eyes went wide. “tommy?”

”wilbur!” he screamed. he practically crushed wilbur with his hug. “oh my god! you’re alive!”

”i mean, yeah? i just fainted.”

tommy frowned. “uhm. wil? you didn’t just faint. your organs were failing.”

wilbur blinked slowly. “what?”

tommy frowned and returned to his seat. “yeah. you were about ten seconds away from death, big man.”

wilbur smiled a little before saying, “aw, well shucks.” 

“hey! don’t joke like that!” tommy grumbled.

”so what’d i miss?”

”well, karl’s asleep but he’s over there. he was in the same boat as you, since you dumbasses decided that was smart. techno beat the shit out of dream when he said it wasn’t karl’s fault.” tommy said nonchalantly, as if it wasn’t techno beating up his best friend.

”so what happened?” wilbur asked slowly.

”well, you were sitting at the table super dazed. dad was like ‘wil you okay?’” he said, mocking his dad. “and you stood up and just SPLAT! hit the ground. techno called an ambulance and i screamed at karl, blah blah blah the whole wrap.” tommy explained quickly.

wilbur glanced over to karl’s bed, frowning. “he’s already woken up, right?”

”yeah, unfortunately.” tommy mumbled.

”the fuck do you mean unfortunately? he’s a person, tommy.” wilbur shouted.

”yeah he also let you fuckin knock on deaths door.” tommy paused. “dad doesn’t want you to be around him anymore.”

”he’s all i have.” wilbur cried. “he’s the only person who understands!”

”oh yeah, and understanding is letting you kill yourself?”

”i wasn’t killing myself!” wilbur screamed. a nurse entered the room at the shout and wilbur quickly added. “i don’t want my brother here right now. or anyone.”

the nurse frowned but escorted tommy from the room. wilbur immedietly pulled the glucose drip from his skin as best he could, letting the liquid fall on his arm instead of into his viens. he tucked his arm under the blanket and arranged the drip so it would look attached. he couldn’t do much about the tube, but he was too exhausted to care.

”karl!” he whispered harshly.

”’m sleeping,” he mumbled.

”it’s wilbur! i’m awake, shithead.” he whispered, laughing.

karl shot straight up and his eyes landed on wilbur. he jumped from his bed and laid down beside wilbur, wrapping him in a hug.

”wil! god, they thought you were gone for good.”

”lucky me, i guess?” he replied laughing.

karl smiled and curled up to wilburs side, careful to avoid the wires. he had dragged his own glucose drip stand with him when he jumped, nearly ripping out the wire.

”oh! apparently while i was in my little coma thing my birthday happened. i didn’t know i’d be out for four days, but i guess i’m eighteen now.” karl announced happily.

”as in, old enough for us to buy our apartment under your name and move in?” wilburs jaw dropped and karl smiled.

”precisely.” 

the stars and moon were out full force that night. karl and wilbur still laid side by side, despite the nurses being angry about it.

wilbur stared at the ceiling idly. “do you ever think about getting better?”

karl shrugged slightly and sighed. “i mean, yeah. this whole experience did open my eyes. it would be nice.”

wilbur thought for a moment before speaking. “so why don’t we? why don’t we get better?” he paused, observing karl. “we are just about as bad as it gets, so why not get better?”

karl sighed. “it’s scary. i’m 18 now, so i can’t really get forced back into the hospital. you, however, could.”

wilburs eyes lit up and he gasped. “wait, let’s just leave! they can’t send me back if we run.”

karl considered it for a moment; “i overheard the doctors, though. they want to transfer you friday. it’s wednesday, wil.”

”tomorrow we see everyone one last time then in the middle of the night, we change into our clothes and we run. we can make it to my house, get the van, and leave! we have enough money,” wilbur proposed.

karl smiled and nodded. “but we are gonna try and get better, right..? it might be worth it.”

”yeah. i just don’t wanna go back to that goddamn hospital.”

the next day rolled around in a blur. everyone came to visit, but now a security guard was standing between karl and wilburs beds, blocking techno and dream.

”so wil, how’s the hospital been?”

”a pain in the ass. that nurse got pissed at me this morning for taking out my drip.” he replied, laughing.

phil frowned. “wil, why did you even take it out?”

”it felt gross. why else?” he said smugly. “i am kinda excited to go to the hospital, though. maybe this time i’ll get better.” he said smiling. he laughed at himself in his head, knowing he wouldn’t go back.

phil smiled. “i’m glad.”

tommy and tubbo were looking at brochures quietly in the corner before phil called them over.

”wil has to go back to treatment tomorrow, boys. spend as much time with him as you can before we have to go.” phil said, frowning. it was already 8PM, and they all had to sleep by 9:30. visitation was different for some reason, in this ward.

after a few hours, his family was gone and the security guards weren’t paying much attention from the hallway.

”it’s go time, karl.” wilbur said smiling.

karl nodded and slipped from bed. he changed quickly, yanking out the glucose drip. wilbur did the same, happy that their tubes had been removed earlier.

wil glanced out the door before gesturing to karl to begin walking. they strolled out the door leisurely, trying to look like they belonged. they quickly got into the elevator and made it downstairs, out the front door.

“that was exhilarating! how did we not get stopped?” wilbur laughed harshly as he began to sprint, karl following. they couldn’t be close to the hospital when security realized they were gone. 

they kept running until they were two blocks away. wilbur slowly remembered the way home and dug his keys from his patient bag.

he hid behind the bushes as karl kept watch. he slipped into the drivers seat of his large van, the back converted into a sleeping area. he backed out of the driveway and stopped, letting karl in and speeding off to the bank.

he withdrew as much as he could in cash and they stopped by a river. they turned VPN’s on for their phones and ditched their debit cards. they also switched clothes, wilbur tossing his into the river and karl tossing all but his multicolored hoodie.

they crawled back into the car and immedietly began to drive. they didn’t have a specific destination, but they figured they’d find one. just as they were getting towards the outskirts of town, an emergency warning on the radio sounded.

”two patients from the west medical facility-“

wilbur quickly cranked the volume and listened closely,

”-have gone missing. please be on the lookout for two boys: names Wilbur Soot Watson and Karl Jacobs. wilbur is aged 17, height 6’5, and 151 pounds. brown hair, brown eyes. commonly seen in a red beanie, yellow sweater, and black jeans. he is at immense risk of death if not treated soon. karl is 5’9, aged 18, and 115 pounds. he has dark brown hair, hazel eyes and is often wearing a multicolored block hoodie and black jeans. both boys have been hospitalized for an illness known as Anorexia and are in immense danger if they don’t receive treatment soon. please call the tip line if you see them, that’s 800-7-“

wilbur and karl turned to face each other and fear filled their faces. wilbur sped up on the freeway and quickly drove far out into the desert. he guessed they were in rural nevada, now.

he found an isolated part of the desert and parked. he crawled into the back of the van with karl and they opened the back sunroof, watching the thousands of stars.

”guess they really wanna find us, huh?” karl whispered softly.

”guess so.” wilbur sighed and reached across the van bed, grabbing two microwave meals. “we’ve got to eat since we are trying this whole recovery thing.” 

he quickly popped them in the microwave, powered by a generator he kept in the car. he passed one to karl and stared down at the plates.

”this is scary.”

”yeah. yeah, it is. one bite at a time, okay?” wilbur said calmly. karl nodded and they both picked up a piece of chicken with their forks.

wilbur counted down from three and the two boys took a bite. he almost broke out crying, but forced himself to remain composed for karl.

this continued until the plates were empty. they decided to stay up and watch movies on karl’s phone for at least an hour so neither of them would purge.

sometime during the first movie, wilburs phone started to ring. he raised an eyebrow and picked it up.

”oh shit. do i answer?” he said quickly, showing karl.

karl paused the movie and winced. “no longer than a minute. i know we have VPN’s, but chances are they could find us.”

wilbur nodded and quickly accepted the call.

”hey dad.” 

“WILBUR! holy shit. where the fuck are you?” he said quickly. 

”uhm. gone?”

phil sounded like he was running, wind through the phone. ”the fuck do you mean gone? get back to the hospital right now!”

”i can’t, dad. i’m not going back to that dumbass mental facility. not without karl. you don’t want me to be around him anymore and i can’t do that.” he explained sadly.

”are you with him right now?” phil said, anger seeping into his voice.

”uhm. yeah.”

phil groaned and went to talk, but wilbur cut him off. “sorry dad. i have to go now, i’ll send you postcards or something. i love you. tell the boys i love them too. we are gonna get better.”

he quickly hung up the phone and wrapped his arms around his legs. karl put an arm around wilburs shoulder and frowned.

”i’m sorry.” he mumbled into wilburs shoulder.

”it’s okay. he has some narrative that you’re the bad guy. but you aren’t.” wilbur replied confidently.

”i’m tired. can we sleep?”

”it’s only been 45 minutes. 15 more then we can go to bed, okay?”

karl nodded and unpaused the movie. they sat quietly for awhile until the movie ended and they crawled under a few blankets. they watched the night sky fade darker and darker and the stars shine brighter and brighter as they drifted off to sleep.


	13. running from the law

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the boys r on the run

as soon as morning hit, they continued driving. wilbur and karl took turns between drivers, only stopping to get gas and stock up on food. at about 6, they woke up to drive, and at 7 they stopped a few miles away from a gas station to eat then get gas.

breakfast went the same as dinner the night before. they ate together, finding to easier than being alone. karl had a panic attack halfway through the meal, but eventually they finished. 

after breakfast, wilbur filled up the gas. he parked by a gas pump and walked inside, setting down a 20$ bill.

”20 on pump 5, please.”

the cashier nodded and went to the register. the news was playing in the back, and the cashier turned to watch it for a moment when he was done adding the money.

he raised the volume and quickly a picture of wilbur and karl appeared on the screen.

“two patients from southern california escaped late last night. police are asking for anyone with information to call the number on the screen,”

”so sad what happened to those boys.” the cashier said, turning around. “say, you look a lot like one of them.”

”oh, do i? that’s funny.” wilbur put on his best persona and smiled. “luckily, i’m david. not Karl or Wilbur. i hope they find those boys soon!” he said, rushing out the door. he quickly filled the gas tank and sped out of the parking lot.

”shit. the news was playing, the guy said i looked like.. well, me. so i rushed out. we need to get far from here now.” wilbur said quickly, speeding up to 90 in a 70. they were pretty far out into rural nevada at this point that he figured it was safe.

”ill check the news.” karl said, grabbing his phone about 20 minutes after. “oh, that’s us.” karl gasped.

”what? show me.”

karl leaned across the center console and security cam footage of wilbur at the counter played. 

“Wilbur Soot Watson, one of the two boys to escape from the hospital last night, was spotted in western Nevada. we are unsure at this point if Karl Jacobs is with him, but chances are high. we will be following this story as it develops. the police are asking people in the area to look out and contact them if they catch any sign of the boys or Watsons’ van, license plate L-“

”fuck.” wilbur mumbled. “we need to get farther north east.” he said quickly. he sped up and split off onto a new road leading east. he checked the mirrors every minute until he and karl pulled over to switch drivers.

karl drove slightly faster than wilbur, eventually finding themselves in colorado. wilbur thought it was beautiful, but rather barren.

they found a small wooded area and quickly pulled over. it was noon, so time for lunch. the routine went the same until lunch was over.

”wilbur, i can’t do this.” karl said quickly.

”what?”

”this- this eating. i feel so gross. i need this food out NOW.” he insisted.

”karl. no.” wilbur stated. 

karl reached for the back door of the van and attempted to crawl out. wilbur, knowing him well enough to know he was going to purge, grabbed him and hauled him back into the van.

”let me go! LET ME GO!” he shouted.

”karl, you can’t purge. i know you are scared and trust me i am too. we are in this together, okay?”

karl sobbed softly and curled up to wilbur. he frowned at karl’s state but knew how tough it was.

after awhile, karl had calmed down enough to keep driving. they drove for six hours until they needed gas again. wilbur changed clothes and rushed in, telling the man to add 20 on pump 7.

luckily, the worker didn’t recognize them and they filled the gas. they drove out to an isolated area for dinner. now it was wilburs turn to avoid.

”i’m not hungry, i’ll keep driving while you eat, okay?” 

“fuck no. come on, let’s eat.” karl insisted. 

“can i just.. skip this one? just once.” wilbur begged.

karl shook his head and handed wilbur a plate, who continued to protest. eventually he gave up and ate with karl, before continuing the drive for an hour and parking deep in the forest.

just like the first night, they fell asleep under the stars.


	14. home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> wilbur goes home :]
> 
> anddd that’s it boys! new fic soon hopefully but here u go :D i rlly hope you all enjoyed. i never expected anyone to like this, bc it was literally just me screaming into the void and pushing my problems onto minecraft streamers but yk. thank u for reading and until the next time, goodbye boys :]
> 
> o7

the weeks felt like years. he’d get calls everyday from his brothers or father, voicemails pleading him to come home. he would always listen to them and make sure there was room for more voicemails. he would listen to one in particular over and over.

_“hey wil. we uhm, we have everything ready for when you come home. your rooms cleaned now and stuff. i just.. i really hope you’re out there. i hope you’re alive. i want to believe you are, but it’s hard. tommy’s distraught. he’s not left his room in days. summers ending, too! your birthdays in a week and we are celebrating wether you’re here or not. send me a postcard when you can, just as a sign you’re alive. the news is all over this and it makes me almost mad. they keep standing outside begging for interviews. if you come home, i promise i won’t be mad. i love you, wil. please be okay.”_

he restarted the clip and listened it it again through his headphones. he and karl had just finished dinner and he’d been gone for nearly three months now. his birthday was in 4 days, as the voicemail was older. he clicked onto another one and clicked play. 

_“hey wil. how do i even do these? i don’t know. anyway, dad says i should stop sleeping on the floor of your room. i sleep here so if you come home i’ll be the first to know, i guess. it’s hit me really hard. i hope your out there. and i’m sorry for what i said about karl. if that’s why you left, i’m sorry. i take it back. just come home, okay? love you.”_

he’d never heard tommy sounds so devastated. it almost hurt him enough to go home, but he resolved to ignoring it for at least four more days. they couldn’t send him back if he was 18, it was his choice. he had gained a little and he noticed how much less fragile he was. he didn’t feel constantly tired and exhausted anymore and he was so happy.

”karl?”

”yeah?”

”i can go home in four days and then we can get our apartment.” he leaned down against the wall of the van and sighed.

karl nodded and smiled. “i’m excited. i don’t think they like me but once your 18, they can’t send you to the hospital. plus you are practically recovered!” 

wilbur smiled and sighed. “let’s start the drive back now. with breaks, it should line up.”

karl jumped into the drivers seat and soon, they were on the route home.

their disappearance had become a nation wide affair. people everywhere knew their story and were eagerly awaiting them to show up at home. he wondered how they’d react when news broke they’d returned.

karl and wilbur stood infront of the front door. it had been four days, meaning he could go home. he wasn’t sure they’d want him, but he hoped for the best. 

he took the key from his pocket and unlocked the door, pushing it open. the first thing they noticed was how void of noise the house was. it was a sunday, so it was possible everyone was still asleep. 

they crept up the stairs and wilbur lead karl to the kitchen. he instructed karl of where to sit and he walked down the hall to phil’s office.

he knocked softly and heard a shout from the other side.

”come in!”

wilbur creaked open the door and phil turned around in his chair. his jaw dropped and he threw the headphones from his head, running to wilbur and crushing him in a hug.

”wilbur! holy fucking shit you little weasel.” he cried. wilbur returned the hug and smiled.

”hey dad.” 

“oh my god! your brothers will be estatic. holy shit!” phil pulled back from the hug and held wilbur by his shoulders. “you look so healthy, wil!”

”recovery can do that for a person, i guess.” he replied smiling. phil fell back into the hug before ushering him to the living room.

”techno! tommy! tubbo! dream! come here, please.”

tommy grumbled as he walked down the stairs. he rubbed his eyes as he reached the bottom of the staircase. “unless the stupid bastard showed up i don’t wanna hear-“

he spotted wilbur and screamed. he practically flew across the living room, wrapping his arms around his brothers neck as he cried. 

“hey, tommy.” he said softly.

”you little jerk! holy shit.” he examined his brother and tears streamed down his face. “you got better?”

wilbur nodded with pride and gestured to karl. “couldn’t have done it without him.”

tommy smiled and footsteps came from the top of the stairs. tubbo had the same reaction as tommy, mainly screaming.

soon, techno and dream walked down the stairs sleepily. techno spotted wilbur and his eyes went wide. he blinked harshly. “i’m not imagining it, right? that’s wilbur sitting there?”

“in the flesh.” wilbur announced. techno jumped onto the couch and joined the large group hug, shouting.

”i see you and dream made up after you beat the shit out of him.” wilbur laughed and raised his eyebrows at his brother. 

techno grumbled and nodded, moving over so dream could join the hug. “won’t ever forgive him for the broken nose, though.” dream said, laughing.

“happy birthday, asshole.” phil mumbled, smiling.

karl spoke to everyone and soon, the hatred they had for the boy faded. they all sat around the table and ate the birthday cake they made for wilbur, talking about what he missed. tommy spoke about how he and tubbo made a friend named ranboo who was even taller than wilbur. techno told them about how he and dream fell in the creek and how they forgave each other. phil spoke about how they all would watch wilburs favorite movies, waiting for him to return. wilbur shared anecdotes about their months on the road and soon, news broke to the media that they were home. that night, not just the watsons celebrated, but the whole nation.


End file.
